Dreams

I wonder what would happen if I ever pursued one of the things that I dream about doing well in.
Okay.. that sentence was constructed poorly.
I want to do what I dream of doing.
Maybe that would help me get out of this funk? I feel like I don't produce anything. I don't produce a good-looking physique, I don't draw, I just sit here and eat myself to death.
Instead of fantasizing about doing well and being complimented, I should gather the fortitude to actually try it.
Don't be afraid of failing.


Anyway, yeah. I'm going to buy a camera with my next student loan check and then save the rest. That's the plan now, I mean. I used to be fascinated with photography in high school. I guess it suits my creative needs as well as my ADD tendencies. I watched a documentary on Henri Cartier-Bresson this evening. I remember how much he inspired me.
I was looking up concert photography just now. A lot of websites advise contacting the publicist/the band themselves if you want to come take pictures at a show. Not big bands, lol. Just local ones that aren't too stuck up yet :p Maybe that is all it takes. A few misses will eventually lead to a hit and a photo pass. After I build up a portfolio that is.
I remember how much I wanted to do this, photography I mean. It was that one bad review of my pictures that terrified me and made me stop all together.

Yes! Okay. And I am taking anti-depressants again. Yay Jessa. Let's see if they actually help.

I can be better, right? I can do this. :]
More entries later on what kind I decide to get.